


Snow Days

by CleverCorgi



Series: The Arctic Hare and the Easter Bunny [3]
Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Fluff and Smut, Humor, M/M, MPreg (Hermaphrodite), Original Secondary Characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-22
Updated: 2013-08-04
Packaged: 2017-12-20 23:25:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/893130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CleverCorgi/pseuds/CleverCorgi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Snippets of time between <em>Snow Pooka</em> and it's sequel, <em>Snow Fall</em>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. How Jamie Got Grounded

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, here's the first side story in _Snow Days_! It's just a 300+ word drabble, but the idea wasn't asking for much more. More will be forthcoming as I get it written. There will be either 4 or 5 little stories, of varying lengths, depending on my muse.
> 
> And, actually, this one occurs right after Chapter 8 of _Snow Pooka_ , but the rest will be between the two. It's just a funny little scene that occurred to me belatedly.
> 
> Enjoy!

Jamie was puttering around on his computer, trying to decide on a computer game to play, but he was too distracted by what had happened earlier that day.

Jack was a – a _Pooka_.

Of all the things he could imagine, something like that had never occurred to him as even being _possible_.  And then there was the bit about making babies – kits, he called them – but he’s a _guy_ with a _guy_ , and –

Jamie shook his head and laid it back onto the top of his chair.

 _It doesn’t matter.  Jack is Jack.  Always will be.  Doesn’t matter that he’s a giant rabbit now, like the Easter Bunny.  And that wolf-lady – Jack called her some sort of Queen? – said that he’s a shapeshifter, all three of them, so he can be human again when he learns how.  Not that I care, but I bet he does.  On some level.  I know I wouldn’t want to be changed like that without warning_.

“Sophie!” his mother called from downstairs.  “Bedtime!”

Jamie ignored her.  That is, until –

“Shit.”

 _Wait, what?_ Jamie’s head snapped up and stared out the door.   _What did she just say?_

“Sophie!  Where did you learn such language?” his mother reprimanded.

Jamie heard the heavy footfalls of her coming upstairs.

 _Shit_.

His mother burst into the room.  “James Alexander Bennett!”

“I didn’t do it!” he immediately replied, hopping out of his chair and holding up his hands pleadingly.

His mother cocked a solitary eyebrow at him and crossed her arms, tilting her hips so that most of her weight rested on her right leg.  “Uh huh.  Explain.  Now.”

Jamie fidgeted.

_Crap.  Crap crap crap.  Jack said it, but I can’t tell her that!  She’d never believe me!  I can’t say that one of the others said it, she’d just get them in trouble.  Um, um, um –_

“Well?”

“Jack Frost said it!” he burst out, before wincing.

_Idiot idiot idiot._

She gazed at him, the eyebrow never wavering as she took a deep breath.

_I am so screwed._

“Shit.”


	2. Surprise!

“Asteria,” Jack called through the kitchen window.

After a moment, a brown-furred set of ears appeared, followed swiftly by a pair of bright green eyes and a smile.

“Yes Father?” she asked politely.

“I want you to ensure that Lavie doesn't get up to any mischief while you’re at Katherine’s.  Or North’s, after,” he instructed as he carefully diced vegetables for dinner.  “She had that scheming look on earlier.  She's planning something.”

“How do you know what that looks like?”

“I see it in the mirror every day.  Watch her please.”

“Yes Father,” Asteria replied dutifully, smile drifting towards a smirk.

Jack arched an eyebrow at her as he pointed a half-chopped stalk of celery at her unwavering grin.  “And no dying the goose any colors either.  Neon pink was bad enough!”

Asteria rolled her eyes exaggeratedly before she disappeared from the window and started running back to her siblings, where their last few things were getting packed into North’s sleigh.  He was going to shepherd them over to Katherine’s, much to their delight.  Jack was just glad that Aster wasn’t awake to complain about the boisterous old Cossack being in the Warren.

“Asteria!” Jack called warningly after her retreating back.

Her ears twitched and she threw a “Yes Father!” over her shoulder in that long-suffering tone only a teenager could manage.  Jack would know - one of the perks of being an immortal seventeen-year-old.  He shook his head as he returned to his dinner preparations.

_Asteria is such an enigma_ , he mused as he worked, allowing his thoughts to wander back over the past year.

After the shock had worn off, Aster had been downright _furious_ that Seraphina would do such a thing without consulting them.  True, the baby had been stillborn, but that did not give Mother Nature leave to do whatever she wanted with her.  She had still been _their_ child.  Jack might have taken the time to be angry as well, but, instead, he had let Aster rant and rave while he watched for Asteria’s reaction.

She hadn’t responded like an adult to Aster’s tirade; in fact, she had gone suspiciously still where she stood near Arcturus, who had still been staring in shock.  Her gaze drifted slowly to look at Aster, whom she had just addressed as ‘father’ not minutes before, and gone a bit misty eyed.  That’s when it had clicked for Jack; yes, they should have asked before doing whatever they had done, but, at the same time, Asteria was quite obviously still a child at heart – and she wanted them to be her parents.  Jack decided swiftly that that was the role he would take.  She would be their daughter, strange circumstances or not.

However, while it was true that she was their daughter, Asteria, she was also Asteria, the former Mother Nature and Arcturus' mate.  She had refused to reclaim the mantle, citing as her reasons that Seraphina was doing a perfectly fine job of it and that she would rather enjoy her second childhood.  And she really did seem to be enjoying it to the fullest.  Now that her growth had settled out to a more relaxed pace, she seem to be stuck in the stage between preteen and teen mentally, although he was given to understand that her body would need a couple more years to reach that same point.  It all had to do with the nature of her soul.

Apparently, when she had died, she had trapped her soul in that sapphire necklace - what she called a 'soul jar' - and stuck around for the past twelve thousand years or so as an object, teaching and training her replacement.  She still had to wear the necklace for the time being, as her soul was 'bigger,' in both age and experience, than the young body she now inhabited could contain.  If she took off the necklace, she reverted to a more childlike state.  She actually seemed to prefer doing this on occasion while playing with her siblings.

Even without removing the necklace, she would intermittently display very childlike behavior; one minute she would be having a very serious discussion about global climates with Sera and the next would be giggling along with Lavender over some prank her sister had pulled.

Not that Aster ever realized who the culprit was behind them.

Jack sighed in fond exasperation. _One of these days...._

It wasn't that he turned a blind eye to them either; it was more of that he quite honestly could not believe that his 'little angel' was the one behind whatever catastrophe had just occurred. Zygmunt usually, quite seriously, took the blame for her.  That at least made sense; the elf was her best friend – and minion.  There really was no other word for it.  When he wasn't available, Hawthorne dutifully filled in for him.  Jack still wasn't quite sure why.

Lavender had not yet caught on to the fact that Jack was always aware of her scheming.  Jack was both grateful for this and, paradoxically, tempted to give her pointers.  He resisted, fully aware that 'Uncle Raven' was already fulfilling the role of advisor.  He didn’t want her to develop too quickly; she was already getting pretty sneaky as it was, and, at one-and-a-half, was supposedly equivalent to a four year old human child.  Jack didn’t recall any four-year-olds he knew being quite so creatively mischievous.

Cypress was a small enigma all his own.  He spent most of his time reading in the Library and, while he never seemed to be involved in his sister's pranks, Jack was pretty sure that some of the more elegantly planned ones had his touch.  He always looked just a tad too innocent when one of those pranks went successfully.

Strong paws sliding around his waist and a warm body pressing up against his back completely derailed his train of thought. Jack hummed happily.

“Hello sleepy head.  Decided to rejoin the world of the living?” Jack asked.

Aster had been sleeping for the past few days, since Easter.  He’d really worn himself out this year.  Jack felt Aster slowly chin his head before answering.

“Ow ya goin’, love.  Whatcha makin’?” Aster asked, his accent thick and sleep-slurred.  He must have just woken up.

And come right to Jack.

_Awesome_.

“I'm making your favorites for dinner.  We're going to have the house to ourselves for a while.  The kits are staying over at Katherine's for the next week and then going over to the Workshop for an extended stay,” Jack explained as he set down the utensils and turned in Aster's embrace, cuddling inward.  Aster squeezed tighter in response.  Jack glanced up as he nipped at Aster's collarbone.  “We'll be _all alone_ for the start of my season....”

Aster growled possessively and chinned Jack again, quite a bit more aggressively than before.

“I like the sound of that, Snowflake.”

Jack chuckled.  “Go.  Find something to do while I finish dinner.  We can have fun _after_ we eat.”

 

~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~

 

They had been going at it for several hours before things finally wound down.  Jack’s season had had the delightful timing of kicking in during dinner.  They got to eat most of it, at least.

“So, I was thinking,” Aster said after several minutes of post-coital snuggling.

“Dangerous pastime, that,” Jack replied cheekily.

Aster swatted Jack playfully.  “Oi!  I’m trying to be serious, mate.”

“Okay, okay.  What were you thinking about?”

“Kits.”

“What, already?  They’ve only been gone half a day, at best.”

“No, Snowflake.  I mean, having more.”

Jack sat up and blinked.  “What?  But the others aren’t even two yet!  I don’t feel comfortable getting pregnant again quite so soon.”

“I didn’t mean for you to carry them, you drongo.  I’ll carry this time.”

Jack blinked before grinning.  “I did tell you that you’d have to do so next time, didn’t I?”  Aster nodded, grinning in turn, before Jack grew serious again.  “Are you sure?  I mean, we just had children not even two years ago!”

“Well y’see, Jackie, it was common in Pookan culture for couples to breed several litters in rapid succession.  By the time the next litter was born, the first would be about two years old.  Plenty old enough to take care of themselves and, within the year, be able to help with their younger siblings.”

Jack shook his head as if to clear it.  “Right, right.  ‘Cause a two year old Pooka is about, what, a five year old?”

“More like six, but, as you’ve already seen, they can be quite a bit more responsible than human children.”  Jack nodded as he considered Aster’s proposal.  “And, Jack… I… I’d just really like to have more.”

Jack’s expression softened at Aster’s pleading gaze.  How could he say no to that face?

“I suppose we’ll have to wait for your season to start before we can get you pregnant?”

Aster’s smile could have brightened even Pitch’s lair.

 

~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~

 

**Eight months later**

“Damn it, Aster!  You were supposed to get pregnant, not both of us!” Jack shouted as one of the Seraphina’s attending to them advised him to ‘push’ again.  “Oh, shut up!  I know that I – aah! – am supposed to fucking push!”

“Don’t – aah!  -- look at me, mate!  Arcturus is the one who screwed up your biology!  Stop poking me!” Aster replied, before admonishing one of the Seraphina’s attending to his labor, who had been prodding him with an odd cylindrical device.  She ignored him and nodded thoughtfully at some sort of display on the widget.

Jack turned to gaze at Old Man Winter off in his corner where he was examining several piles of parchment that he’d brought with him earlier and glared.  “Damn it, Old Man!  This is your fault!”

Arcturus twitched but otherwise managed to ignore Jack’s building tirade as he reviewed the transformation process, looking for the error that made it so that Jack couldn’t prevent ovulation, as was otherwise normal for a Pooka.

_I do not know how we could have missed something so vital!  I must find the error and correct the other seedlings before they come to term, or we will have an uncontrollable population explosion on our hands!_

 

~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~

 

**Several hours later**

“Finally!” Jack exclaimed as he relaxed, exhausted, backwards into the pillows propping him up.

Aster chuckled.  Jack shot him a glare.  The bastard.  _He’d_ been done with labor four hours prior and he’d had _seven_ kits to pop out to Jack’s one.

“Totally not fair!” Jack groused as he threw his head back with a soft thump into the pillows.

Aster wisely kept his mouth shut this time and returned his attention to the kits he was holding.

_God, so unfair,_ Jack pouted.

The double pregnancy had come as a surprise to everyone.  Arcturus had first admonished them both for being irresponsible again.  That was until Jack adamantly insisted he’d done exactly as he’d been instructed and it hadn’t worked.  Arcturus scoffed, but obligingly tested Jack’s genetics for signs of defects.  He’d returned an hour later, looking sheepish.  He admitted that they _might_ have made a _teeny_ mistake that meant that Jack lacked the ability to prevent ovulation.

To put it bluntly, copulation meant ovulation which meant, in turn, impregnation.

Based on Aster’s expression at the time, Jack suspected that the Easter Bunny had learned several new curses in about a dozen different languages.  Jack was also pretty sure that Bunny had no clue what ‘scruffy looking nerf herder’ meant in _any_ language, let alone Swahili.

Arcturus had at least come up with a special blend of tea that would prevent ovulation by convincing the body it was already pregnant, much like several forms of birth control humans used.  The best part was he only had to drink it once every forty-eight hours to ensure potency.  This meant that morning sex wouldn’t accidentally get him pregnant before he could have his morning cuppa.

_Damn it Aster, stop rubbing off on me.  I don’t want to_ think _in Australian!_

Jack had decided right then and there that he would be drinking it daily, regardless.  Just to be safe.

But that was only the _beginning_ of the unfairness of it all.

Jack had had _all_ the same symptoms – morning sickness, temperature swings, cramps – _everything_ he’d had previously.  At least the temperature swings were of a more realistic variety, with him just feeling alternately cool and overly warm.

That wasn’t the unfair part.  Oh no.

Aster had had none of those symptoms.

_None_.  _Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.  Zero._

Sure, he got mild backaches on and off, especially as the pregnancy progressed, but _nothing_ else.  Jack had been green with envy.  And then he’d had the _audacity_ to have an easy labor!

_Still…._

Jack came out of his musings and glanced at his mate and couldn’t help the smile that graced his features at the sight.  Aster was staring at the eight bundles of joy strewn across his bed spread with such awe that it was heart wrenching.

Jack had had another Summer kit.  Male this time.  His name was Oleander.  He looked similar to Asteria when she’d been born, although his tiny tufts of fur were a lighter shade of brown.

Aster had given birth to seven in total.  A mix of Spring and Winter, of course, since he wasn’t genetically randomized like Jack.  Two Spring females, two male.  Dianthe and Eranthe, Narcissus and Coriander, respectively.  The girls had a very pale blue cast to their otherwise steel grey fur.  The boys were a paler shade of grey.

As for the Winter kits, there were three, two of which were male – Kale and Salix.  They had decided to name the female Hyacinth.  All were a striking shade of white, quite similar to Jack’s, although Hyacinth had a cute little patch of fuzzy grey fur over one eye.  Maybe she’d have more.  You couldn’t tell the boys apart just yet; perhaps they’d have differently colored eyes.

Taking in the sight of Aster’s Joy, Jack couldn’t help but feel a swelling sense of pride, touched with awe.  It still threw him that they could even _have_ children, even after the past two years of having already _had_ four.

_He looks so happy.  Maybe it’s not so bad, the months of suffering, if this is the result._

Aster glanced over and simply beamed at Jack, before his gaze was inevitably pulled back to the kits, as if they had a gravity all their own.  Perhaps they did, for Jack found his gaze drawn back to them too.

_Totally worth it._

_Totally_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was supposed to be smut. Where'd it go? Oh well....


	3. When the Dark Lady of the Elves Conquered the Workshop or, How Lavender Saved Christmas

The first to collapse was Phil’s younger brother, Bill.

Then several of the older Yetis fell ill, followed swiftly by the kitchen staff and, finally, the Workshop floor itself.  In less than a day’s time, nearly all of the Yeti at the Workshop caught the virulent Yeti flu.  Phil and several of the medics were the only ones left standing.

It was two days before Christmas.

Zygmunt knew what to do.

 

~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~

 

“Dark Lady!  Dark Lady!  The Yeti have all fallen ill!  Christmas is in peril!”

The Dark Lady of the Elves considered Zygmunt for a long moment, tapping her claws against the arm of her throne.  She grinned, a feral gleam in her eye, and stood.

Casting her paw forward, she exclaimed, “Now is the time for us to strike, Chief Minion Zygmunt!  Summon the Militia!”

“Yes Dark Lady!  At once!”

 

~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~

 

The invasion was a resounding success.  The Elven Militia had claimed the Workshop in the name of the Dark Lady virtually unopposed.  Phil had taken one look at them, rolled his eyes, and gone back to the infirmary to help the medics.

“Excellent.  You have done well, Chief Minion.”

“Thank you, Dark Lady!”

“Now, we must organize the regular minions and prepare for the coming trials!”

“Yes, Dark Lady!”

 

~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~

 

North was in a blind panic, running about the ward, going from Yeti to Yeti and barking orders to the few still standing.  Aster was at the other end, tending to several patients at once, while Tooth was instructing a hoard of fairies on basic medical care and monitoring.  Sandy was settling those who were having trouble sleeping with pinches of his sand.

Jack felt completely useless.  He was perched on the crook of his staff in one corner, watching the proceedings with a faint pout on his face.  Occasionally, a medic would wander over with water for him to chill, but that was about it.  He should have just stayed at home with the new kits instead of allowing himself to be dragged out here to stand around and chill water.  He was betting that Katherine and Arcturus were having more fun than him with the two week old newborns.

He was just beginning to ponder what he could do to pass the time when he heard a faint clinking sound from outside the infirmary.

_What was that?_

Jack glanced around.  No one else seemed to have heard the sound.

_Must have been nothing—_

Thunk.

 _Okay, now I_ know _I heard something._

No one else seemed to have noticed, so Jack hopped down from his staff and stepped out of the infirmary.

Into chaos.

Scratch that.  _Controlled_ chaos.

“The hell…?”

Jack hopped up and glided into the air, circling the globe.  Everywhere he looked, elves were hard at work, painting, building, crafting, boxing, wrapping, sorting.  The elves were making the presents.

The elves were being _productive_.

“What in the world…?” Jack trailed off as he caught sight of something shocking.

In the middle of the Workshop floor, atop a raised dais on a ‘throne’ that seemed to be one of North’s comfiest chairs, sat Lavender, Zygmunt at her side.  Or, at least, he thought it was Lavender.  She was dressed in a cute little black cape with a hood, which was drawn up, and was barking orders in Elvish.  Elves were scurrying at her command.  Jack had recently begun to pick up bits and pieces of Elvish – a must, given how often Zygmunt hung around the burrow – and was completely confused by the byplay.

“Dark Lady!” Zygmunt said, turning to address Lavender after having spoken with one of his fellow elves.  “Asia _something something_ done!”

“Excellent, Chief Minion!  _Something something_ Europe!” she declared in reply, elves scurrying at her command.

 _Dark Lady?  Asia, Europe?  Chief_ Minion _?  Is she… she’s – she’s_ actually _managed to organize the elves into a coherent work force?_

That - was a really scary thought.  On the other hand -

 _I have_ got _to get the others to see this!_

Jack flit back into the infirmary and dashed over to Bunny.  Mates had priority, after all.

“Aster!”

“Not now, love.  Busy.”

“It’s about Lavender.”

Aster’s head immediately snapped over to focus on him.

“What is it?  Is she hurt?” he asked worriedly.

Jack refrained, with great effort, from rolling his eyes.

“No, silly rabbit.  She’s… done something, with the elves.  You _really_ need to see this.”

“Frostbite –”

“ _Now_ , Aster.”

Aster sighed.  “Fine, mate.  Fine.  I’m coming.”

Aster took two steps out of the infirmary and paused for a long minute, stunned.  He then shook himself and dashed to the balcony, only to freeze in surprise again as he saw their daughter ordering the elves about.

“Mate?” Aster asked softly after a moment.

“Yes Bun-bun?”

Aster didn’t even notice the usually annoying endearment.  How sad.  It really spoke of how shocked he was.

“Is she – is she ordering the elves around?”

“Yes.”

“And they're _listening_?”

“Mmm hmm,” Jack confirmed, smirk falling into place.

Aster sniffed faintly, coughing immediately afterward to hide it.  Jack still noticed and just barely prevented a grin from forming as Aster turned to look at him, eyes wide.

“I’m so proud,” he said in a slightly choked voice.

Jack smiled fondly at Aster, laughing internally at how he was always such a ‘proud papa’ when Lavender did _anything_.  At least this time she really did deserve it.

“Shall we go tell the others that the ‘Dark Lady of the Elves’ has saved Christmas?”

“Yes, yes,” Aster said, nodding absently as his gaze drifted back to his daughter.  He froze a moment later and asked, eying Jack warily, “What did you just say?”

Jack simply laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aster, Aster, Aster. Such the proud father. So blind to her tricks....
> 
> Ah well, she did something helpful for once, so I _suppose_ he has every right. ^_^


	4. The Groundhog's No Good, Very Bad Day

Punxsutawney Phil, Groundhog Extraordinaire, was woken at the ungodly hour of 3:43 AM on the morning of February 3rd, the day after his amazing, wonderful, momentous holiday.  Certainly, it was _much_ better than Easter.

Starting from a sound, blissful sleep, he glanced at his alarm clock in consternation.  He could have _sworn_ he’d turned that blasted thing off – _ooooh, hangover_.  Flailing around a bit, he managed to slap the alarm off, rolled over, and went back to sleep.

Two hours later, he was awoken again to the sound of a chainsaw revving.  Practically diving out of bed to hide beneath, it took a few moments for his hangover-addled brain to recognize the sound as an alarm clock.  Not his certainly – _where’d that come from?_ – and he stood, wobbled for a moment, and then squinted about the darkened bedroom of his cozy little den in search of the offending item.

After several minutes of rummaging in the hamper – _I really need to wash my towels_ – he found the offending item.  It was a pocket watch.

_Huh.  Not mine.  Maybe one of the other spirits accidentally left it here last night?  I can’t remember; the party was too awesome to care about such trifles.  Weird alarm though._

Tossing the watch on his dresser for later, he hopped back into bed to continue sleeping off his hangover.

The bed collapsed, folding in two and trapping him for several panicked minutes before he extricated himself from its vice-like grip.  Or maybe he was still too hung over to be terribly coordinated.  Either or.  Groggily moving his mattress out of the way, he discovered that the boards that supported it had mysteriously slipped out of place and were lying on the floor beneath his bed.

_Odd_ , he mused, before groaning as he again noticed his hangover-headache.  _Whatever.  I’ll figure it out in the morning._

Fixing the bed, he plopped down carefully, bounced a couple times to be sure it was safe, and then promptly fell over and returned to snoring up a storm.  That was until, two hours later, _another_ alarm went off.  He woke up with murder in his eyes and dashed over to the offending item – a Hello Kitty alarm clock that he had _no_ idea where it’d come from – and threw it against the wall, shattering it into thousands of pieces.  Satisfied with the destruction of his adversary, he took stock of how his headache was more or less gone.  He then noticed that his bladder was full.

_Well then, off to the bathroom.  Maybe I’ll take a shower while I’m at it; that should clear my head._

Nodding to himself at his great wisdom, he meandered over to the ensuite bathroom and opened the door, heading inside – and then a bucket of freezing water fell on his head.  He began shivering immediately.

“Ack!” he exclaimed as he struggled to take the bucket off his head.

Finally succeeding, he threw the offending object out the door.

“Damn that Fox!  He must have set that up!  I’ll have to get him back later.  For now, no more parties for him!” Phil muttered as he moved to use the toilet.  “A hot shower it is.”

Opening the toilet, he sighed as he relieved himself.  It took him several moments to realize that his legs were getting wetter.

_What the hell…?_

“Damn it!”

Someone had wrapped plastic wrap over the toilet bowl.  Snarling as he ripped it off and threw it in his waste bin, he stomped into the shower and threw on the water.

“Aaaaah,” he sighed contentedly as he warmed up.

He closed his eyes against the growing light as day crept in his windows and washed his fur on autopilot while his mind wandered back to the _amazing_ party he threw last night.  Of course it was amazing – _he_ threw it!

Rinsing off, he stepped out of the shower and dried himself off with a towel, tossing it blindly at the hamper just outside the door.  Stepping up to the sink, he reached for his toothbrush as he glanced in the mirror – and shrieked.

“What the hell?  _Why am I red?_ ”

Darting a glance at the shower, he realized that all the water remaining in the tub was red.  Moving over and turning on the faucet produced more red-colored water.  Tentatively, he tasted it.

“Phew,” he sighed, relieved.  “Just food coloring.  Damn that trickster to hell.  Now I need another shower.  I’ll fix it in a bit.  First…”

He returned to his toothbrush, only to find it frozen solid, head down, in a block of ice in the cup.  He snarled loudly.

“Fuck it!  I can’t deal with this on an empty stomach.”

Heading out into his bedroom, he opened the door, which swung out into the hall.

BANG!

He jumped several feet backwards and just about out of his fur.  Peering cautiously out of the room, he saw nothing.  Peeking behind the door, he found a popped balloon attached to the top of the door and a pin embedded in the wall.  He growled angrily and marched out into the kitchen.  His footpaw caught on a piece of string as he entered –

SPLAT!

– and came face to tin with a lemon meringue pie.  Wiping the goop from his eyes, he opened them to see a tiny catapult sitting on his counter, attached to a string that ran down to a broken trip wire at his feet.

“The hell?  Damn it, now I need another shower!  I am _not_ eating while covered in _pie_!  I _hate_ pie!”

Snarling as he marched back into his bathroom, he flipped on the water and watched it first, warily.

It was green now.

He sighed. _Whatever._

Hopping in and resolutely ignoring the fact he’d be all Christmas-y in a moment, he set to washing his fur out.  Again.

Then the water turned ice cold.

He shrieked and hopped out of the tub, dripping green-red water everywhere.

“Damn it!  That’s it!  I’m going to go and give that damnable trickster a piece of my mind!”

Stomping out of his house in a blind rage, he failed to see the scattering of marbles on the path.  He screamed as he slipped and fell on –

_A trampoline?_ He thought incredulously as it bounced him forward and into a pit.

Of honey.

_Fuck me_.

Flailing about, he found that it was only waist deep, but had totally covered him while he was fighting for purchase.  Feeling slightly sheepish, but no less angry, he climbed out of the pit and took a step forward.  His footpaw caught on another tripwire.

_Shit_.

He was promptly covered in feathers.

A camera flashed off to his right, startling him.  He tripped and fell on his rump.  Wiping feathers and honey out of his eyes, he was startled to see three small rabbit-persons standing a few feet away, with a psychedelically-colored elf holding a camera off to one side of them.  They were grinning madly.  In fact, he’d seen that expression once before, on –

“Jack Frost.  You’re his kits!  And – and the Easter Bunny!”

The female that looked disturbingly like that insufferable Bunny, even down to the eyes, nodded as her grin turned feral.

“Yes.”

The largest one, with ginger-fur and hazel eyes with a touch more amber than was usual for such coloring, grinned darkly and flexed his not-inconsiderable-for-someone-his-age-muscles when Phil moved to stand.

Phil sat back down.

Sitting was good.

The white one, paler than his father with eyes the color of a winter sky, quirked an eyebrow.

“Astute assessment, Mr. Groundhog.  Although obvious, given that our fathers are the only Pooka _you_ know.”

Phil shivered at the implication that there were more.  The white one’s grin grew to match his sister’s feral one.

“What did I _do_?”

“You predicted an early spring.  Which upset Papa,” the white one explained, tone reasonable.

Phil blinked.  “But I do that at least every other year!  What if I had predicted a late winter?”

The white one cocked his head to the side inquiringly, with an expression that said ‘Are you daft?’, but it was his sister who responded, saying, “Why, we’d have done the same.  It would have upset Father.  And we do _so_ hate to upset Father.”

Phil blinked as realization dawned, creeping dread twisting his stomach.

“That’s it?”

The big one grinned darkly.

“Oh, no,” he said, voice deeper by half an octave than the other two.  “You do not get off so easy.”

The white one added, “You should expect this treatment every year you upset Father or Papa.”

“But that’s what I do!  Not upset them, I mean, but predict the seasons!  The weather!” Phil wailed.

The female replied simply, “Then we will see you next year.  Ta!”

They turned and hopped off.  The elf took another photo of Phil’s horror-struck expression, grinned at him and waved, and then dashed off after the kits.

_I’m so doomed._

 

 

~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~

 

Jack sighed contentedly on the couch as he melted into the cushions.  Sex with Aster was the _best_.

The day prior, Jack had been quite disappointed by the – _annoying_ – Groundhog’s prediction of an early spring.  On the one hand, sure, it was nice for Aster, but, on the other, it meant less snow days for him to play with.  Aster had expressed sympathy for Jack, which had been totally unexpected, given he should be celebrating the early spring, and Jack had decided to show him just how much that meant.

They’d been having sex for the past day as Jack showed his appreciation.

The kits had decided, unanimously, to go over to visit ‘Uncle’ Raven right before Jack pounced.

They were such good kids.

“Papa!  We’re home!” Lavender announced as the front door swung open, banging lightly against the wall.

“What have I told you about banging doors?” Jack warned mildly.

“Sorry, Papa!” Lavender dutifully replied, somewhat dryly.

A folder was unceremoniously dropped in his lap.  Jack started, as he’d had his eyes closed.  Glancing down, he saw the slightly glossy sheen of photographs peeking out the edges.

“What’s this?” he asked as he held up the folder.

“Simply a record of our exploits today, Papa,” Cypress explained, with that too-innocent expression on his face that always caused Jack’s stomach to drop.  “We’re going to go play with big sis.”

“Bye!” they cried in unison as they darted out the front door.

“What have you three gotten up to now…?” Jack wondered as he righted the folder and opened it to reveal a pile of photos.  His jaw dropped.  “Nooooo… they didn’t.”

He flipped through them quickly, a goofy grin growing on his face despite himself.

“ _Duuuude_.  They did!” He sprang to his feet, photos in hand.  “Aster!  You have _got_ to see this!”

“What?” Aster called from the library.

Bunny located, Jack bounced into the library and dropped the photos on the book Aster was reading.  Aster froze as he processed what was in front of him.

“Mate, _what_ _did you do_?”

Jack’s jaw dropped.  “ _I_ didn’t do it!  The kits did!  Look!  There’s Lavie, peeking out from behind that cabinet door, waving at the camera!”

Aster grunted.  “Huh.  So she is.”  He flipped through the images, a grin forming despite his obvious efforts.  “They really got him, didn’t they?”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but we have to ground them.  Me!  The Guardian of Fun!”

Aster sighed and nodded, still grinning.  “I know, Snowflake, I know.  You’re right.  But…”

Jack grinned in reply.  “Yeah.  Maybe for just a day or two?  It _is_ pretty awesome.”

Aster laughed as he nodded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it for _Snow Days_! Up next, _Snow Fall_. Mwahahahaha!


End file.
